New Year's Eve ceilidh fun ...

Finally New Year's Eve has arrived! Aside from Christmas Eve leading into Christmas Day this is my favourite time of the year. A friend and I have been organising (along with a small team of amazing people!) a ceilidh for church. Originally I had been stressing that people wouldn't turn up as ticket sales were slow ... now I'm stressing about how we'll fit everyone in as we ran out of 'tickets' days ago but people keep asking and we can't say no.

It'll be the first ever EMBC Hogmony Ceilidh, and I'm really looking forward to it. Throughout the night I'll be calling the dances, we'll have some party 'turns' and other fun stuff as well as a bring and share style buffet. Later this afternoon some of us are heading to the church to squeeze as many chairs in as we possibly can with as many tables as we can fit ... and to test out the sound system and dance floor, lol!

The really exciting part is that loads of folks from church have said to friends and so they are coming along too. So tonight will be a really good oppertunity to connect with new people, not seeking anything from them other than perhaps a dance. So though we're not sure how we'll fit everyone in ... though I have way too packed a programme ... roll on tonight!!!

New hair for a new me?

Until last Tuesday this was my hair ... not always as nice looking (was at a wedding that day), but long and slightly coloured.

That was until my hairdresser chopped it off. Ok, so I asked her to, but still. Was a painful thing, once that first cut was done though there was no going back. Was really insecure about it until one of my best friends came over and gave it her approval - it's amazing how vain I can get.

However, in the past few days quite a few people have commented on it ... the comment going along the lines usually of "new hair for a new year and a new you huh?!" I know they mean no harm ... but do I really need a new me?!?

Anyways, was thinking about what a new hair cut does though. I always feel like I'm changing not only what I look like but in some way who I am. Like I am reinventing myself. And there is loads that I want to change this year. Already have New Year resolutions worked out. Maybe I'm not quite new yet, but hopefully the new hair signals things to come ...

Friends ...

At this time of year there is always some sentimental reflection on the year that's passed ... which was done communally on Tuesday after lunch. As we reflected on the year we also reflected on our friendship. What an amazing group 'the girls' (we have some other names too!) are!!! This year has held many changes for us as a group of friends and our friendship has grown. As we were chatting we realised how truely amazing and invaluable our friendship is to one another.

The mark of friendship is not only standing by each other through thick and thin, but being able to be totally (sometimes brutally) honest with each other, knowing it is done in love and for the best. The friends I have are the kind you don't need to worry about calling at 2 in the morning. The kind that ring you up after you have a break-up and come round right away - chocolate, wine, dvd and tissues in hand. The kind that pray for you and send you wee encouraging verses just because they can and you are in their mind. The kind you host parties with, and wanna throw parties for. The kind that speak the truth in love and will tell me if my bum looks big in this, knowing I'll do the same back. The kind of friends that know all your little quirkes as well as secrets ... and are still your friend!

I don't tell them often enough how much I value them, love them and appreciate all they are and all they do. But I do! They inspire me ...

Christmas Eve party ...

Yahey, the annual Christmas Party hosted by 'the girls' (and the wonderful husband of one of the girls) is tomorrow night! We went shopping the other day for all the food, drinks and such like - without having first thought through where we would store it all ... thank goodness for the churches basement freezer! Tomorrow food will be cooked, spare chairs will be carted over from church, we'll all dress up ... and Christmas will finally have arrived. It's one of my favourite parts of Christmas. We're the most unlikely group of friends if you take a look at us, but our faith makes it work somehow. As usual we've organised a secret Santa (complete with a visit from Santa) ... only we're so rubbish at not knowing who has who, trying to keep it secret is fun.

I can't wait! It's one of the few times in the year where you definately get us all together - we even all make an effort and dress up for the occassion. For me, somewhere in this mix, this is when Christmas really begins. There is something in the gathering together followed by going to the watchnight service that somehow makes the the meaning of Christmas clear.

Incarnation ... coming to dwell among and with ... somewhere, somehow in our gathering this becomes real for me. It may sound cheesy, but Jesus is present, tangibly, and Christmas comes alive for me. To anyone else that might not make sense, I may not be able to articulate it well, but for me thats what happens.

Who knew so much could come from a simple Christmas Eve party!?!

The 'difficult' people ...

Work today was interesting. Many 'difficult' people came through the doors. Firstly there were people like me who wanted things we didn't have, never a good thing first thing on a Monday morning. Then there were many of the people I encountered over the counter - those who were 'difficult' because they were just so rude. The first person was ok, I'd had coffee and devotions and so could cope with them. The second and third ones I gritted my teeth and served them with a smile and pleasent manner. By the fourth and on I had decided (in my stubborn way) that I would be extra smiley, extra cheery, and really be 'difficult' back to them in their current mood!

But then there are the other 'difficult' people. The ones that are marginalised, or perhaps difficult to serve and so a burden, or perhaps just those who are mostly misunderstood. Such was the lady I served this afternoon. She's lovely, but a little excentric, and so is one of those 'difficult' people, and often I'm the one left to serve her - which to me is actually a priviledge. Anyways, she comes in today and orders a cappuccino, which I make for her, taking time to make the chocolate sprinkles into the shape of a Christmas tree (it's great, wish I could make shapes in the coffee all the time!) which made her face light up. Getting her settled at a table the ladt decides she wants a photo of her and the Christmas tree coffee so we need to move to a new table with better light. That's when the accident happens - pot of hot boiling water all over the place - and the lovely lady in a tizzy over her 'stupidity'. That's when everyone looks and stares, not just because of the loud clatter, but because of what the lady said. Moving as quickly but as gently as I can I settle her, trying to reassure her that it won't take a moment for me to clear it up and really she's not stupid or a bother or anything of the sort. It really doesn't take long, but as I do this I hear all the things she calls herself - and my heart breaks. For what she says over herself is pure lies, yet things that she obviously believes. And so as I clear in my mind I'm praying against what she's saying, and speaking the counter to her speech out. In a few moments the mess is cleared up, she settled again and the photo has been captured.

But as I go back to work my devotions of the morning come back to mind - all about the power our words have, especially the words we speak over ourselves. How they have the power to bless and curse. How they affect how we feel and act. And I wondered who there was to correct this lady, to speak words of life over her and not death, so that in time she would be able to do the same over herself.

Not long after I finished, but by that time many people had commented on my patience with the lady. I don't think I was patient. I think I just didn't see her as the 'difficult' person others did. I wasn't patient but rather treated her as a fellow human person who just needed some kindness, warmth and understanding. Someone who could see she was special and had dignity and who wasn't stupid or a nusance. And as I made my way over to her as I left to tell her to have a happy and blessed Christmas, she smiled the largest smile I had seen all day. She wasn't one of those 'difficult' ones after all, not to me. But perhaps she exposed us as the 'difficult' ones, the ones not good at treating the other, those different to us, as actual people the same as we are. I'm glad she came in today, and I'm glad the chocolate Christmas tree made her smile, and I pray she has a Christmas in which she hears what God speaks over her. For God so loved the world (inculding those deemed as 'difficult') that He gave His only Son ...


(Oh and for those wondering ... the coffee pictured is not mine. If only I were that good! Gotten from here instead ... http://www.flickr.com/photos/busman/329561084/ ... but who knows what latte art I'll be creating after I get trained next year, lol!)

Avent Street Ponderings ...

Well, after being out on the street on Saturday the cold I had been fighting kicked in and I've spent lots of time this week sniffling, coughing, sleeping and lazing watching movies. Aside from that I've been pondering in my mind what took place on Saturday.

A group of us met together in Buchanan Street, and were led by a wild minister (well, mildly wild!) to several locations to read some of the Scriptures relating to Christ's coming into the world and to take communion together in the street in an act of embodied faith.

One of the locations was Central Station - and much to our surprise we weren't thrown out, though someone did notice the police clock our presence. We read some of the Matthew and Luke accounts and then began discussing how it 'felt' to hear and to read in this place over and against where we usually hear it (i.e. our comfortable churches and houses). "Irrelevant" one person piped up, and many agreed. This provoked much discussion, no least in realising that Jesus came into the world quietly while people went about there business in ignorance, whereas today it just seemed irrelevant and there was a difference.

We were the largest group in the station, until beside us a group of deaf people gathered, and with much gusto stood in a circle and began signing to each other. That was it for me, it had been hard for me to hear the Scripture words before, but now we were discussing while the folks beside us signed they had my complete attention, for their actions conveyed conversation with each other, graceful movement to me, and added somewhat to our developing discussion. What about what we had just done. Was it a sign or a symbol? What difference did the words we spoke make? Did they make any difference, after all they were only spoken to each other, though in the presence of 'the other' who were invited to listen in I guess, but never really did? What made what we did difference to what someone else was doing with small figurines of Mary, Joseph and Jesus - placing them in locations where people could see them or not while their picture was taken.

Though I haven't properly developed any kind of theology around it, nor looked too deep into others, for me something was happening in the heavenlies when what we spoke was taking place. Something was going on that we could not see, yet though we could not see it does not mean that it was not happening if that makes sense. Paul writes in Ephesians:
Put on all of God's armour so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirit's in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 6:11-12 (NLT)
We are not fighting against powers and principalities we can always see, but they are there. We are in a battle and we are the ones involved. Yes, it's God's battle, yes it's God's armour ... I'm totally not disputing or denying that ... but we are not uninvolved. And so as part of the armour we are told to "take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God" (6:17).

Swords are things used to attack. That is their purpose. A shield, now that is for defence, but a sword is for fighting with. Part of the power of God's word is that it fights and attacks. It is a weapon that does things, things as Paul has already said happens in this seen world (as we know sometimes when watching people hear Scripture) and in the unseen world, in the heavenlies. Exactly what it does or how I have no real idea, but in my head I literally see pictures of opposing forces and beings doing battle above us. Therefore when we speak out Scripture, even when it seems irrelevant like in Central Station, it has power to do mighty amazing things that we simply cannot see or even imagine. God says that His word will not return empty but will achieve the purposes He desires (Isaiah 55:11) - and if it is a sword and actually also sharper than a double-edged sword (Hebrews 4:12) then that means that part of its purpose is to do battle. So the words that were spoken on Saturday were not just words, they had power and were actively doing something. Our words have power, and when our words are words of Scripture the power becomes especially potent. Something happens!!!

After the station came coffee, and after the coffee communion. We were using the Litany of Resistence (see http://peace.mennolink.org/articles/litofres.html or Shane Caliborne's book Jesus For President for an abridged version) and having words that we could speak together in unity stopped any self-conciousness and gave substance to what we were doing that words made up on the spot would not have had. Knowing how to respond meant that we didn't always have to look at the sheets either, and for me praying "forgive us for we know not what we do" became a heart-felt cry as people walked on by unaware and uncaring. To them what we were doing was meaningless, weird even, but for me in that moment repentance was taking place, repentance that went beyond just individual me somehow, extending in some way to those that were just walking by blindly. At the end being able to afirm and proclaim what we would do together gave a chance not just for repentance to have happened, but for hope to have been awakened, hope of a new and different way, hope of the actual alternative kingdom of God breaking into the here-and-now of the world. And so, sharing the familiar words from Scripture, the bread was broken before us and the cup lifted high and both were passed between us, one to another, and then the reminder was poured (not spilt!) onto the street, a symbol (for me anyway, others can interpret it how they like) that Christ died not just for us, but for those who walked upon this street and for creation itself.

After that our little party broke up and filtered seamlessly into the street amidst the crowd and on into the rest of the day. Yet, with the knowledge that our words had not been powerless, our actions had not been meaningless, and something had happened that day in the heavenlies and on the street that would not have happened had we not been there. The Word had come to life on the street.

the blue screen of death ...

My computer developed 'the blue screen of death' on Wednesday. Only, at first I didn't realise that's what it was. Then someone came along who knew what he was talking about and shared with me the news making sure to give adice on how to sort the problem. Sorting the problem involved saying goodbye to the old computer, cutting all ties with it and getting rid of it. Then it involved spending time getting a new computer, installing it and having someone come and install it, showing me how to get the most out of it. Now it involves me actually using it and using it in the right way.

Mmmmm, wonder if there is some form of message or illusration in that ... or would that be too simple!

My bus trip ...

Well, today was a better day at work than Monday ... for a start nothing broke down on us ... a miracle in itself! Still, was tired when I left and was in a dream-like state for most of the bus ride home.

Just coming into East Kilbride when a man and toddler son get on. Now, I have to confess what first made me 'attentive' to them was that the man was wearing three quarter length sports trouser things (displaying some nice tattoos) as well as black ankle socks and a pair of Vans, plus a hoodie thing and leather juacket. Now, with it being so cold and all it seemed like the trousers would cancel out any warm the hoodie and jacket gave. Anyways, the look made me look!

The wee boy just smiles at me as dad puts the fold down pram thing in the bit its meant to go in on a bus, and the two sit opposite me. I don't know how old this wee boy is, but he's young enough to still need the buggy but old enough to talk a bit. Anyways, by this time the pair have my full attention.

I watch as the wee boy looks out the window and the talks, pointing at what he sees. The dad lets him speak, then joins in, telling him more about what it is etc. The dad gets the boy to pose for photos he takes on his mobile, and the wee boy is more than happy to do it, having fun, making memories. It is as if they are oblivious to other people, so caught up in each other.

In my dream like state I sensed God say to me thats what its like when we're together. You know, those moments when you're oblivious to everyone else but your Me and to you it feels like the most secure place ever. Nothing threatens and everything is an adventure. The Father and the child, Me and you, locked in an adventure, doting on each other.

The wee boy gets excited as the dad lets him push the red button that makes the bell noise. They get off and the adventure goes on ...

The Word Before The Powers ...

Have finished reading The Word Before The Powers: an ethic of preaching by Charles Campbell which I totally recommend. Brilliant book!!!

Am now half way into The Word on the Street: Performing the Scriptures in the Urban Context also by Charles Campbell as well as Stanley Saunders. In it they flesh out what Campbell explore in The Word Before The Powers, as they share thoughts, essays, sermons and stories from their work amongst the homeless people on the streets of Atlanta. They use Scripture to read the streets and the streets to read Scripture, which both inspires and challenges me. It's good to know I am not alone though, for it challenges and inspires them too ... after all they are seminary professors, Christians, theologians and human. Their honesty is in a sense liberating, and their stories moving.

In it all you get a sense of what Campbell talks about at the end of The Word Before The Powers. In the final chapter of the book he writes about the four virtues that ought to characterise preachers in addition to love: truthfullness, anger, patience and hope. This is how he concludes his section on hope, and indeed the book itself:

"… In the places of death, hope becomes radical hope in God, for no shallow, domesticated hope will do.

In the places of death, hope itself finally becomes a form of resistance – a defiance of the powers that pretend to rule the world. In the face of the powers, hope is no passive, wishful longing for a better day. Rather, it is a form of resistance to the principalities that masquerade as common sense; it challenges the closed definitions of reality that offer no alternative future. Where hope is present, the powers have lost control, and their reign has been broken. The future opens up, and life becomes possible even in the midst of death.

As preachers enter the reality of Jesus’ resurrection, immerse themselves in the memories of the community of faith, and cultivate hope in the places of suffering, they are prepared to preach with hope on Sunday mornings. They are empowered to enter the pulpit and non-violently resist the powers with the redemptive Word of the gospel. They are prepared to speak the Word that helps set the church free to live faithfully in the face of the powers of death. And grounded in such hope, preachers may even find themselves preaching with joy – the joy that comes from the assurance of God’s redemption and the confidence that we are at least in the right struggle." (p. 188)

And so on Sunday morning I go to preach hope. When I go to work on Monday morning I go 'preaching' hope. As we journey together as preachers in college, we do so preaching hope.

Whatever else may be said
Christ died
Christ is risen
Christ will come again.

The powers do not have the final say. The final say is reserved for God, and God is the God who speaks, puts flesh on and enacts hope. And in resistence to the powers and in awe of God we preach that hope.

Music to my soul ...

Today I must confess, I am weary, I am tired, I walk slowly and draggingly (and am making up words it seems). There is much to do and it seems to little time to do it. And when you're tired and weary you do what you need to do even less well, and it takes even longer.

A highlight of the day was devotions in college this morning, in which we were reminded that we are adopted children of God, that we are aquitted and forgiven, and that we are deeply loved. In a stunning way we were lead with humour and prophetic reference, in which the truth spoke to my soul, the words becoming like music washing over me.

But as the day wore on the weariness returned. After an afternoon of doing more 'stuff' (a.k.a. sermon prep) slowly and tiredly came the jouney home. There in central station as I stood weary and tired, a piper dressed in full kilt outfit stood off to the side and begun to play. Instantly I recognised Flora McDonald's Fancy, and my soul was uplifted. I wish I could have taken a picture, for it was a beautiful sight! As the music moved me, I moved towards the piper. Suddenly I was no longer as tired and weary, but instead had a desire bubbling within to take off my boots and dance. Dance with grace, dance with passion and dance with strength. Though I didn't let the desire bubble out into reality (I was I confess too self-concious), in my mind I danced. And as I danced joy returned. From Flora McDonald's Fancy to something I didn't recognise to Highland Cathedral and beyond, I was moved. The pipers music spoke to my soul.

Thank you Mr. Piperman, you have no idea what a blessing you've been to me today.

Remembrance Sunday prep ...

Today is a historic day in America, though the reverberations of it will reach around the world. As was pointed out in Creative Homiletics today, in the history that has led to today stands a Baptist! Devotions from class this morning responding to Barack Obama's election as the next US President, allowed us to 'hear' and comment on the "I have a dream..." speech of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. To me at least it spoke of how, amongst other things, hope is alive and change is possible. "Failure does not have the last word" when you have "reached the other side of enough" as some students put it yesterday when articulating what the resurrection 'does'. Despite many failures and failings then, when many had reached "the other side of enough" today is a day of new and re-newed hope that change will indeed be possible.


On a different note (?) am preparing a sermon for this Sunday, Remembrance Day. I'm going to a new church that I have never preached in before, having accepted the invitation to come before I realised the significance of the date. Had I realised that first I would probably not have accepted, in all honesty. But I didn't, so I did, and I'm going.

Have never preached on Remembrance Sunday before. Had no idea where to begin with the preperation work ... other than in deep prayer of course. Went to Gathering for Worship which was of little help, so went to 'the little red book' more properly known as Patterns and Prayers for Christian Worship, which was slightly more helpful ... even suggesting appropriate readings. Having gone through them, some more prayerfully than others, Psalm 46 has been settled on, and so the last two days have been spent working with the Scriptural text.

From my own reflections one of the things that spoke most loudly to me in the Psalm was God's resounding "no" to all that would try to overwhelm. That "no" speaks louder than anything else, yet also speaks a "yes". A "yes" to trust in Yahweh, a "yes" to an alternative future to what the circumstances offer, a "yes" to hope. Surprisingly only half the commentary's I've also engaged with seem to have picked up on this in any kind of significant way. Yet it is there in the text. Craig Broyles writes that the Psalm speaks security because God is present, meaning 'the moment when light dispels darkness was symbolic of salvation, newness, and hope.' Therefore as the Psalmist writes "we will not fear."

The stillness is a call to cease, to recognise God and the reality of an ever-present, dwelling God both for now and for the future. The stillness becomes an act (of sorts) of resistance . It says "no" to fear and "yes" to trust. It says "no" to despair and "yes" to imagination. It says "no" to present chaos and "yes" to present Sovereignty.

Gerald H. Wilson sums it up like this:
We face death and the dissolution of the world, not because we are assured of a new life after death ... We live faithfully in the face of the ultimate threats of life because God is at the core ... Life with God is not dependant on life as we know it - or even on the universe as we know it. Life with God transcends our need to life here and now at any cost. Life lived in the power of God's refuge and strength becomes eternal life - not just life that hopes to be restored in some future perfect existence, but life that is not threatened by the imperfection of our world or even by the dissolution of all we know.

In all this 'stuff' there is strong message for Remembrance Sunday. A time when, yes we come to remember and to pray, but also create space to imagine and hold onto the hope that is birthed and clung to as we are still and know that God is God, no matter the surrounding chaos. Ultimately its about the rule of God. We remember those who fought and died in wars, we pray for those who still do,but we anticipate when wars will be no more. As Isaiah puts it so beautifully, we look forward to a time when "He will judge between the nations and will settle disputes for many peoples. They will beat their swords into plowshares and their spears into pruning hooks. Nation will not take up sword against nation, nor will they train for war anymore." (Isaiah 2:4) Quite how the text will work its way into a sermon text to be 'performed' is tomorrows work, but tonight I go to bed reminded of what it means to be still, to really cease all strivings and quell all fears, and in that space dare to put all trust confidently in the awesome God of hope.

Devoted honesty ...

The LORD your God is with you,

he is mighty to save.

He will take great delight in you,

he will quiet you with his love,

he will rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

Thank you Coral for sharing so beautifully and honestly tonight on what is also one of my favourite verses. It was a real blessing and "wow" moment!

Micah challenge ... part two ...

Well, arrived at church last night to be greeted by someone with a 'word' for me. They shared it and God definately spoke in that moment. Just what I had been praying for and not sure of God confirmed in just one word. Was such amazing assurance for me, and a blessing for the person to know that it did in deed make sense to me, and that God was nurturing the prophetic gifting in them.

And so the word / challenge God had laid on my heart through Micah was shared last night. Afterwards many came up and said that I had "done a great job." And I wanted to yell, "what, I did a great job?!" That was so not what I wanted to hear. I did not want to hear I'd done a great job, just because I was one of their own as if it were some form of performance (which, no exaggeration, is how it sounded somewhat). What I wanted to hear was that they had sensed God's voice and heard His challenge. What I wanted to hear was that something in their actions would confirm this challenge being heard and acted upon. What I wanted to hear was a recognition that the walk with God required acting justly and loving mercy in concrete rather than arms length abstract terms. What I wanted in a sense was for the community to stand together and say "amen, lets live this way."

I got none of that, but that doesn't mean none of that is present. I spoke what I felt led to by God, and so now I trust that God by His Spirit spoke into hearts and is somehow, somewhere at work in it all.

On a more personal note for me, I realised how terrified I am of our little 'Act of Kindness' project last night as Morag, Jo and Fiona led YF, talking about their work on the streets. Apprehensive about the people we'll meet, the conversations we'll have, the impact it'll have. I shared with Jo later how scared I am ... but at the same time how I know I need to give it a go. God loves all people, and so must I. Or sermons just become trite words, discussions puffed up hot air, and the Spirit's uttering that I sense are never put into practice. Justice becomes held up as some form of abstract concept again, like it has for so long, rather than something dynamic that is participatory and becomes concrete through action. I may not be 'called to the streets' in the same way as others, but how am I to know if I do not try. What I do know is that I am called to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with God. Therefore I need to engage in the Act of Kindness project, allowing the Spirit to do in me whatever He wills, encouraging others to do the same, and see where this crazy ride takes us. For some this may not be a big deal ... but for me this seems a much bigger deal 'in my flesh' than choosing how I shop for example. But if the Spirit keeps sending us the same message over and over again then He's definately up to something, and I want to be part of that something, even if with fear and trembling ...

Micah challenge ...

Am preaching at EMBC tonight. At the moment quite nervous and praying hard! Feel like I'm walking a tight-rope between my own rant and something that God has laid on my heart.

We were speaking this week in Creative Homiletics about trouble and grace. The idea that biblical passages can contain trouble, but that they also contain grace ... the trouble needs to be worked through though before grace comes. I fear that what is heard tonight will be more trouble than grace. To an extent I'm ok with that. Am becoming more and more convinced that in order to be disciples we need to engage in issues of social justice and a whole heap of other 'stuff' (or the powers and principalities), and that if we're not can we really call ourselves disciples. However, while to an extent I'm contented with the harsh sounding-ness (is that even a word!) I'm aware that part of my role tonight as a preacher is to come from among the people as one grappling with this themselves and speak God's words in a way that will mobilise the community and not stop them in their tracks.

And so this afternoon I'm praying hard ... for peace in my heart ... for the right words in my mouth ... for open hearts to hear from God ... and for open bodies to respond.

Lord, let it be Your words said in Your way that come out my mouth tonight and not anything of my rant and my issues. Let it be done to Your glory, that people would walk deeper with you, with justice and mercy being qualities that mark us out as belonging to You. Amen.

Community at the Assembly ...

Quite literally have just returned from the Baptist Union of Scotland's annual Assembly. This year it was held in Glasgow, which means returning took only 20mins and ensured last night and tonight I got/get to sleep in my own bed - for which I am grateful!

The theme of the Assembly was 'The DNA of Discipleship'. Catchy title and really there were good things about this weekend. Not least of which was Mark Greene talking 'empire theology' and 'stuff' yesterday morning. Catching up with people was good and helpful. Listening to presentations was sometimes good and sometimes helpful. Worshipping together is always good and always helpful.

Yet, what I enjoyed most about the weekend, what the highlights were if you like, had nothing to do with any of that. There were two and both are all summed up in the word COMMUNITY!

After the college presentation our lecturers (though that is not the right term, as they are more than lecturers) wanted to take us out for coffee. So off we students went, gathering more students and former students and students other (better?) halves along the way. By the time we reached the coffee shop we were many. Yet rather than disperse, we moved furniture to be together. Conversations broke out that very quickly turned deep ... especially (not surprisingly as ministerial students) about 'this journey called ministry', in all its differing senses. Points were discussed, questions asked, opinions shared, thoughts provoked, learning stimulated ... all over coffee, cake and ciabatta. Time passed, quickly, as it does when it is being enjoyed amongst friends. Before we knew it we were late for the next session and so decided to walk leisuely back together, continuing in conversation.

We were doing community together. Not because it was forced, not because it was felt we needed to, or were obligated to ... but because actually that is what we are. We are a community together. Of students yes, but more so as Christians, as people seeking to follow Jesus and learn what it means to come under His rule even more. And in that there is a recognition that we can't do it alone, and so we do it together, becoming part of the shaping forces in each others lives. And that continued even into the dinner with two friends.

That was a highlight of the Assembly for me.

The other came just after communion, as the closing act of worship. Communion is a powerful time, and this was too, as a core leaders and others served the body with the symbols of Christ's body and blood ... and (in my case at least) not silently, but with the words "this is Christ's body given for you ... this is Christ's blood poured out for you." After that onto the platform came a small team. After sharing that their presentation (given at a conference in Germany earlier in the year) was both Scottish in culture and simple in language, images began to appear on the screen. Images of Scottish things ... places, people, history, and information was shared in slow careful language. As the presentation continued the two girls on stage acted freeze style different kinds of greeting before it was shared that in Scotland we greet with a handshake. And so, the woman continued, the delegates (that had been in Germany, standing in black trousers and white tops) were going to pass among people and share the greeting with them. As it was recieved it was to be passed on to as many different people as possible. And so the team began to move among, and from my position in the balconary the most beautiful scene began to unfold.

People greeting each other ... not in the way we sometimes do in church, you know the "turn around and say hello to someone" forced way ... but in genuine greeting. People began to get up naturally and share with others a handshake, and somewhere in the midst of that God was tangibly present. There was a girl singing, though to be honest I didn't hear the words, but in the music and in the handshakes the Spirit was breathing something that seemed like community in some ways. Not in the same way as in the cases above, but something deeper than I'd seen all weekend ... and I sensed in my spirit the real hope of genuine, loving, committed community. And as the handshake made it way to where I was and I got up to greet others I did so with tears in my eyes, that began to stream down my cheeks (and I really don't do public crying!) because it was truely something beautiful, and I mean beautiful that was taking place. For me, the Spirit was resting heavy and this was in deed a holy moment! It took a while for people to make their way back to their seats, because the handshakes were still going on ... genuinely going on ... a feeling of community was being birthed in some way almost.

That was a highlight for me.

And so the conference was good ... but those moments of community were great. That is what I take away from the Assembly. Discipleship is about our whole lives, that came across load and clear from the front ... and its about being disciples in community.

It never fails to amaze me that God speaks so powerfully. Or that some of what God speaks to me and shows me is for me to share with other people, so that He can speak to them through it too. Often despite my fear, doubt and sometimes the sheer craziness of the 'word' and the utter lack of knowledge of the other person. But God does speak. And (sometimes) I do hear.

Tonight was another example of that - Light and Life event in East Kilbride.

Thank You God that You do. Holy Spirit increase in me an ability to hear, Father open my eyes to 'see' more, Jesus speak Your words to me and through me. Amen

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.
2Timothy 1:7

Work ...

Still going around the same old mountians I realised today. Guess I'm going to keep going around the mountain until I learn what I need to learn and God does what He needs to do in my character and conduct. You think after 3 years I would be getting closer though ...

Whole gospel for the whole person ...

Margaret, the Village Centre Manager (amongst all the other things she does!), was excitedly re-casting vision almost at our QBM the other night. Earlier in the day she had used a phrase when describing the aim of what the Centre is about:

'The whole gospel for the whole person.'

Like it! Haven't been able to get it out of my head for the past couple of days. Think she's onto something really significant, possibly more than she realises.

Got me to thinking ...

Recently have been taken with empire and kingdoms and values and peacemaking and reconcilation and how to put myself where God wants me to be and counting the cost and ... well, you get the idea, a whole lot of things (only some of which are mentioned here).

The key may just be the whole gospel for the whole person. I mean, for me, as well as for others. That's what Jesus was all about right ... He was the whole gospel for the whole person!!!



Reading this at the moment cause it 'feeds my lenses.' Not all that far into it, but today was reading the chapter about Jesus and the powers (Chapt. 3). In it Campbell was talking about the different ways in which Jesus both engaged the powers and offered the alternative. He writes:
As Walter Wink has noted, Jesus' entire ministry challenges the powers, and the gospel itself is "a context-specific remedy for the evils of the Domination System." (Pg. 44)

The gospel itself is a context-specific remedy for the evils of the Domination System. In other words the gospel may work and look different in different contexts, but it always brings life instead of death ... more than that, it brings life in the face of death.

Thats what Jesus was doing when He raised Jarius daughter. That's what Jesus was doing when the bleeding woman touched Him. That's what He was doing as He critiqued the religious leaders. That's what Jesus was doing when He healed the demonaic. That's what He was doing most of all in His death and resurrection. Bringing life to what was dead, inviting people into the alternative. Though, perhaps its not so much of an alternative as we think, but more an invitation into the way things should have been ... after all God created things good and life-full first.

Jesus is the gospel, and as Christians we carry it. We take it's message and tell anyone and everyone who will listen. It may take on different shapes depending on the context, but its always about Jesus.

If it's always about Jesus, then perhaps its not as scary after all. Though it involves a death to self (and that is still a hard and constant battle - for me at least), it involves rising into a new life. An old friend was reflecting today on where our security lies, the fears we have, and how perfect love drives out all fear. I believe this is true, therefore I need not fear what this radical discipleship shall 'cost' me, nor where it will place me. Jesus was always with people bringing hope where before there had been none, and He calls to His follwers to do the same. Remaining secure in Him radical discipleship will involve putting my behind where God is already at work and trusting Him for what will happen when there. Putting my behind to where I deem there to be hope, and it seems to me that Jesus found that everywhere ... especially among 'the least, the last and the lost.' The call to radical discipleship is the call to be involved in bringing the whole gospel to the whole person ... and experiencing it yourself as you go.

Margaret is right to get excited about that!

Does weather match mood?

Why is it always a horrible, rainy night when we have a church business meeting on?

Just a question and observation!

Challenge (part 1) ...

Aside from feeling frustrated, am also living in a place of extreme challenge at the moment. In our creative homiletics class today we had a fantastic discussion (which I'll most likely blog on once my thoughts have gathered and cleared some more), but one of the students hit the nail on the head for me when reflecting on how far he is willing to be present with people etc. For example, he said, what if while out on the street last week he had struck up a conversation with someone. After getting through some superficial conversation what if she had opened up to him and told him she was suffering from domestic abuse(not too far fetched ... they told me on myfirst mission while doing child protection stuff that I was utterly unlikely to face any situation like that - not so!). What would he have done? Say "oh I'm sorry to hear that"? Take her somewhere she could be safe? Take her in himself? What would he have done?

This is my kind of challenge and frustration at the moment. Another student and I were talking and I was sharing that I feel like I'm caught in this internal battle a lot of the time. I read what the Scriptures say, I begin to unpack what it means, I devour all this stuff about radical discipleship ... and my head, heart, the whole lot of me screams 'Amen, that's what I want to be.' I sense God's call within all of that ... and then the 'flesh' part of me kicks in again. How radical am I willing to be? How present am I willing to be? Am I prepared to pay the cost? And that's when all the other part of me screams 'No!' And so there is this internal struggle going on ...

I can not remain 'safe' and 'comfortable', for that is not how a Christian is called to live. A Chrsitian is called to follow after Christ, which may be an adventure, but is certainly not a safe, comfortable or tame adventure. I am a Christian and my desire is to own the name of Christ more, to more fully submitted to His rule. Yet those very ideas and all they contain scare the living daylights out of me. What if I am called to live among the poorest of the poor? What if I am to protest in the streets? What if I am to land in jail? What if this is what it means for me, personally to be fully submitted to the rule of Christ?

When talking about the Sermon on the Mount Dietrich Bonhoeffer says that when it is embodied it is a sign of the visible church. That is what we are to be, a visible church. Visibly putting ourselves in the places where good news and gospel need to be proclaimed and lived out ... embodied Christian ethical living in essence. Does how I live mark me out as being part of the visible church?

Am I willing to pay the cost? Am I willing to bear the consequences of not paying it? We explored Romans 12:1-2 today a little. Mercy ... sacrifice ... just some of the images present. The only problem with a living sacrifice is that it has a tendancy to crawl off the alter ... or at least this one name Mo does.

Therein lies the challenge ...

Frustrated ...

Its now gone 11, I'm tired, got a headache and am slightly grouchy ... but only slightly. Have done nothing but stare at a computer screen for hours the past two nights while trying to write a class conference paper on the beatitudes (Matt. 5:3-12). Embodied radical discipleship ... the eschatalogical tension in living in the now-and-not yet of the Kingdom of God (yes I know Matthew says heaven!) ... what does it mean to be a peacemaker ... what does blessing (makarios) actually refer to ... what about justice and righteousness, meekness and mercy ...

Love it ... there's so much good stuff there ... great red letter stuff (Shane Claiborne) ...

Yet in doing that I have missed a planning meeting concerning social justice and acts of kindness being organised within YF (basically how we can model for the young people and help them live out embodied beatitudes around East Kilbride) ...

I have also missed a worship practice (which I would probably have had to miss on account of the meeting anyway) as well as cell group (space where discipleship is discussed and developed).

Frustrated ... yes I am!!!!!!!!!!!

However, such is the balance of trying to study and have a life beyond books and computer screens, as was pointed out to me today by another student in the preaching lab ...

'Be careful, for writing books is endless, and much study wears you out.'
Ecclesiastes 12:12 (b)

Frustrated ... worn out ... I head to bed ...

What constitutes a good or bad movie?

Went to see the film The Women with some friends tonight. The idea was to go out as girlies and just see a chick flick. Two hours later my mind was definately numbed, but it was followed up by a conversation about what makes a film good or bad. Tastes are different, that's for sure. For example one of my friends enjoyed the fim simply because she hates chick flicks and got to make fun of it. Another liked it just because of who was in it, while another was undecided as it seemed to jump genres a lot ... comedy ... to rom com ... to just plain over acting!

Chick flicks, in my opinion, are fantastic. I love them! It always seems to work out in the end which I really like, the girl always gets the guy, friends make up, families truce and find common ground ... the sky is blue and there isn't a cloud in sight. For the hour and a half they run you can loose yourself in a story bigger than yourself where 'reality' doesn't really exist.

That's all well and good, but while my friends were discussing our thoughts and planning our next girls night in (I just got the Sex and the City movie!), a strange question popped into my head. In creative homeletics we're looking at a book called the Four Codes of Preaching by John McClure which takes four codes that are present within our sermon communication and breaks them down to see what kind of intertext we're sponsoring.

The book is quite complicated and not written in easily accessable English and so I spent some of this afternoon in conversation with a couple of the others in the class breaking down the basic ideas, trying to make things a little clearer.

The question that popped into my head tonight as we talked about chick flicks, having just come out of a not particularly good one was this ... what intertext was it sponsoring? And is that intertext as good as I would like to think? And what does what I watch say about me? While I know films are different to sermons, 'codes' (albeit maybe different ones) are at work potentially (depending on how you want to look at it), and so the questions were sparked off in my mind.

I really need to stop thinking so much ... my brain hurts and I just can't keep up ... plus would be nice to just watch a film once in a while without it leading to either "oh, I could use that scene" or an over analysis of what is going on. Still, the intertext question was there in my thinking ...

Will we go ...

Prayers in college this morning was led by not only reading the Bible (always good!) but by allowing us to reflect on both art and poetry. We were told of the work of Mexican artist Frida Kahlo who at one time had a style that was slightly unusual. One of her paintings is called Diego On My Mind and is a self portrait which also includes the face of her husband on her forehead. The idea is that what is central in her mind and takes up much of her mind 'appears' on her forehead. The challenge was what John saw in Jesus when he exclaimed 'Lamb of God!' in John 1. Maybe he saw a picture of a lamb on Jesus forehead? But it made me think, what would be the picture in the middle of my forehead? Would it be Jesus? Or would it be something else? If others were to look at me and place in the middle of my forehead that which they think occupies my mind, what would they see?

Equally am I prepared to be where people will see through me at all? Prayers was finished with a poem that I do not know the origion of - only that the person reading it recieved it from an older person, in their church I think. It connected not only to prayer, but also to some of my reflecting on yesterday and what it means at times to be here and present. With the poem I end this post and leave its challenge to 'hang in the air' ...

I said, "Let me walk in the fields."
He said, "Nay, walk in the town."
I said, "There are no flowers there."
He said, "No flowers but a crown."

I said, "But the sky is black,
There is nothing but noise and din."
But He wept as He sent me back,
"There is more," He said, "there is sin."

I said, "But the air is thick,
And the fogs are veiling the sun."
He answered, "Yet hearts are sick,
And souls in the dark undone."

I said, "I shall miss the light,
And friends will want me, they say."
He answered me, "Choose tonight,
If I am to miss you, or they."

I cast one look at the fields,
Then set my face to the town.
He said, "My child, do you yield?
Will you leave the flowers for the crown?"

Then into His hand went mine,
And into my heart came He,
And I walk in a light divine
The path that I feared to see.

Principalities, powers and potential in Glasgow ...

Ok, so was out 'playing' today and was so much less intense than I thought it would be ... in many senses it was much 'safer' and less risky than I had imagined. There was much less of the reading aloud Scripture than I thought there would be and comfort zones were maintained. Yet that did not make it unchallenging.

First were two different spiritual exercises - being fully present and attentive among people and then identifying and discerning any principalities and powers that may be at work. I remember when I lived in Stokesley one of my favourite activities was having my daily latte (ususally hazelnut) and people watching. Sitting in one of the window bars I would watch people as they passed trying to guess their emotions and stories as they passed by, judged just on what I could discern from the way they were dressed, the way they walked, the expressions on their faces and what, if any, contact they had with others around. Today's exercise was similar in many ways, though it surprised me to learn that I found it much easier to be present while being still than while moving. While I walked or rather sauntered it was much easier to be distracted, and in a sense I became a part of that which I was trying to observe and be aware of rather than being present in any of objective yet empathetic sense.

It came as no surprise however that most people were not smiling in the slightest and actually most communication happened electronically (despite lots of background noise!) with many people on the phone or with headphones on. Even those people that were 'together' did not appear present to one another. Take for example a couple I saw walking and holding hands. Neither seemed happy in any sense and actually neither seemed to even be aware of the other at all, desite having the physical contact of holding hands. Later this contrasted even more with a couple who were also holding hands but were 'present' with each other and aware of each other, as well as an elderly couple of women huddled together, holding one another up almost.

There was an overwhelming sense of hopelessness amongst the people. A tiredness, drearyness, distant disconnectedness. No one made eye contact with anyone else, and no one smiled at any one. Each was totally caught up in their own world, passing many other people by totally unaware of them. Unaware of the girl that looked as though she had been crying and was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. Unaware of the small gentleman selling the Big Issue outside two of the biggest companies around ... Starbucks and Apple. Visible yet invisible. Present but not 'present'.

It saddened me. It challenged me. After all, how do I respond to that? How can I be good news amidst such seeming 'bad news'? And what shape does that good news take? Actually, while its about me its also not about me, its about 'us' ... the church, the community of God's people (specifically those of us called to 'ministry' this morning). How do we respond? Do we 'see', are we 'present' and aware? How can we be good news to these people in these places?

After dsicussing the first exercise we went back through the street observing / discerning the principalities and powers at work and in competition for people and amongst people in the street. For me the most immediate one was the demon of conformaty. People in their search for belonging have become homogenous - from where they shop, to what they buy, to how they look. The structure of the shops, from their archetecture to their products and everything in between add to the demons, embody the demons and feed the lies. The thing is, most of the time, actually people don't feel more connected or that they belong in any more of a real sense. In fact this principality often feeds into others. The obvious demon of consumerism was present, as were the more subtle ones of domination, isolation and many more all setting themselves up as the antithesis of what they actually are - false gods. In fact the imagery, language and symoblism used reflected something of these religious overtones as the false gods lure people into their false worship. Someone reflected that the street for many represents their place of worship and the products their new gospel ... and though many would not explicitly name it as such, I can't help but agree in some measure.

And yet ...

There were little pockets of hope ...

The Help the Aged people, the Care people ... all with good causes that aid rather than hinder humanity and creation. Though the people representing were most definately recieting speels, still there was hope. People were verbally claiming some of that 'contested space' for good ...

Another class mate reflected that we are quick to point out all the negative aspects of what we sense in these spaces, yet we buy into them none the less, as do many of the people we minister amongst. And therein lies the challenge, for me at least.

Sitting on the steps of a closed down bank we did a kind of Bible study / how would you preach thing based on Luke 12:22-34. Much was discussed, there were many challenges and observations made ... some more heatedly than others it has to be said. Yet what struck me the most was this simple verse:
Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.
(Luke 12:32)

Maybe empire is an unhelpful term at times. Perhaps kingdom would be better. There are two kingdoms - that of darkness and that of light. It is impossible to be of both. You are either one or the other, for darkness and light cannot co-exist ... light drives out darkness. It has pleased the Father to place in believers the kingdom of light. Our challenge is to live and embody that kingdom in the here and now, being aware that it will not fully be realised until the time to come - called to be Kingdom of Heaven people living with the great eschatelogical tension.

Does that mean we remove ourselves entirely from the kingdom of darkness. No. But it does mean we model the alternative Kingdom of Light in the darkness. We live out the Kingdom values amid the kingdom (empire) and draw others to Jesus, the one who places this new Kingdom within them as He calls them to follow Him.

There was much debate today about how we do that ... and today will not in any way, shape or form have ended our debate. What the meaning of becoming poor is, what it means to be good stewards, all of that will continue to be talked about. At the end of the day though none of the talking does any good until it takes on some form of action.

For me that will mean total dependence on God, being a peacemaker in the truest sense, sharing and being good news, viewing people as made in the image of God with great potential, and calling people to an alternative way of life than that which the kingdom of darkness calls acceptable and desirable, all the while seeking to live out that Kingdom as best I can. Ezekiel was called and commissioned, as was read to us at the start of the day, to proclaim what the Sovereign Lord says (Ezekiel 2) ... and then later the Soverign Lord showed him that dry bones can live again and that the word of the Lord causes them to rise up again (Ezekiel 37). It may be one of my favourite passages, and there may be many different interpretations ... but maybe, just maybe, some of the dry bones that I saw walking around Glasgow today could live again if they just heard the Word of the Lord ...

Going out to play ...

Going out to 'play' with my creative homiletics class tomorrow. Feeling both excited and nervous about it at the moment. The basic idea is to explore ideas and issues surrounding an 'extreme' homiletical style - namely preaching and reading Scripture in public places and spaces, what are 'contested spaces.' As a class we're meeting in the centre of Glasgow's city centre, to do quite what exactly I'm not too sure ... but it will involve some reading of Scripture, some moving around, some discussion and most probably some coffee.

One of my lecturer's commented last week that I seem quite taken with "all this empire stuff", and I guess he's right. What I'm battling with is how to be faithful to Christ in what seems quite extreme measures, totally against what the empire values but is Kingdom values, all the while battling with my 'flesh'. The part of me that gets nervous, feels self conscious, needs to be liked, finds it easier to maintain the status quo etc. Yet increasingly I find that at odds with what I should / would be living like if I really was (to use a phrase I heard Shane Claiborne use recently) a 'Red Letter Christian' ... someone who believes Jesus really meant everything He said.

To some I may just be going out to 'play' in homelitics tomorrow, but to me at least its like I'm continuing in my battle. The power of Scripture and what it means ... plus all the 'stuff' that is involved in everything - all the principalities and powers, all the things at work seen and unseen - to do with spiritual battles etc ... is part of my personal battle and something that tomorrow represents in a small part at least. I mean, I say I believe in the power of Scripture, but am I prepared to read it aloud in the street with the same passion I would from the safety of the church building on a Sunday? Am I prepared for my eyes to be opened further as I read about what God requires of me (e.g. Micah 6) while seeing a homeless person selling the Big Issue out of the corner of my eye? Or after reading that buying coffee from Starbucks (which I really like) which may now be ethically traded, I may even go all out and get their fair trade blend, yet still buying it from a company that pretty much dominates the market.

This probably makes no sense to anyone else ... to be honest, I'm not putting it in a way just now that I'm fully happy with either, or that makes sense of what is going on in me just now ... but suffice to say tomorrow will be both informative and formative ... and so I'm excited and apprehensive all at the same time, in relatively equal measure. Guess I should just wait and see what tomorrow brings ...

Messing with my mind ...

Having been recommended this book continually throughout the year have finally bought it and begun to read. SB spoke some from it at Abernethy and that was the final straw, I wanted to read it and see what this irresistible revolution was and could look like.

Now think it should come with a health warning!!! This book is seriously messing with my mind and my heart. My heart is crying out when I read the stories and Shane's theology (in essence) in agreement ... and my mind is asking me am I prepared for that. It is impossible to read this book and not be changed in some way ... the question is to what extent is it allowed to change me ... and how much will I allow it to drive me back to the Book to read in fresh ways things that if I really profess to love God, follow Jesus, and be lead by the Holy Spirit will have a dramatic tranformative effect in my life and lifestyle. Quoting Rich Mullins from a chapel service while at his college Shane writes:
"You guys are all into that born again thing, which is great. We do need to be born again, since Jesus said that to a guy name Nicodemus. But if you tell me I have to be born again to enter the kingdom of God, I can tell you that you have to sell everything you have and give it to the poor, because Jesus said that to one guy too ... [And he paused in the akward silence.] But I guess that's why God invented highlighters, so we can highlight the parts we like and ignore the rest." (pg. 98-99)

This is a book I am trying to read slowly as it poses such challenges, yet am reading quickly as it speaks to the core of me, to strange places in me that long for much of what is described yet am unnerved by it and unsure of what that means and looks like for me. This is a book that I will need to spend some time pondering, most likely with the Book open beside me. This is a book I will need to re-read and re-read to get its full impact. This is a book I'll share with others, all the while knowing that only those with the hearts of ordinary radicals will truly get it.

So while I do all this, asking Him what it means in my life, here are just some short challenging quotes for refection:

'Mother Teresa used to say, "We can do not great things, just small things with great love. It's not about how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it."' (pg. 78)

'Momma T also used to say, "Following Jesus is simple, but not easy. Love until it hurts and then love more."' (pg. 136)

'People always want to define you by what you do ... I'm not to concerned about what I am going to do. I am more interested in who I am becoming. I want to be a lover of God and people.' (pg. 108)

'I truly believe that when the poor meet the rich, riches will have no meaning. And when the rich meet the poor, we will see poverty come to an end.' (pg. 114)

What was it Jesus said again ... oh yeah ...
“God blesses those who are poor and realize their need for him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs. God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted. God blesses those who are humble, for they will inherit the whole earth. God blesses those who hunger and thirst for justice, for they will be satisfied. God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy. God blesses those whose hearts are pure, for they will see God. God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God. God blesses those who are persecuted for doing right, for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs. God blesses you when people mock you and persecute you and lie about you and say all sorts of evil things against you because you are my followers. Be happy about it! Be very glad! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, the ancient prophets were persecuted in the same way."
(Matt. 5:3-12 NLT).

Your Kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven Lord!!!

Weeks of insanity ...

Haven't blogged in a while (why is that so often my opening line!). This week has been my first week going back to relative 'normality' after some time off this summer. By time off I mean time away with my family (hmmm, always so relaxing - though actually this time it really was ... cottage in what felt like the middle of nowhere by the sea helped), going to Soul Survivor and then to one of the Abernethy Trust centres (highly recommend!).

There has been so much to think on and ponder this week. God has done and said so much in this past wee while that only now am I able to digest it in any way shape or form to any real degree. Much of what that all involves will follow in the weeks and months to come I'm sure. However, think it is always good to note and realise that when God wants to speak something He always gets His message across and makes sure He's heard. That's one of my lasting impressions of these past few weeks ... God has been speaking to me over and over again in a million (not literally but it feels like it) ways about the same things and how they are all connected. However, it is not just enough to hear God speak ... then comes the time to act ... and to the acting now progress ...........

Fashioned for greatness

Was watching the Hillsong Women’s Colour Conference highlights from this year the other day. Bobby Houston, one of the Senior Pastor’s was sharing something of her heart. What she shared ties into my study on God’s favour this month. Through it, God really spoke some more into my heart on what it means to be fashioned for greatness by Him and for Him. As she said “God is looking for a company of women who not only delight in Him, but are open to their capacity to be warrior princess daughters.”

1. Fashioned for greatness
God has big, not small purposes for people – Eph. 1 and 2 Cor. 6:1-13
In order for these to come to fruition then there needs to be signs of growth towards maturity so that we are carrying ourselves as those who are becoming what we are – daughters of the King
This involves guarding our hearts, governing our minds and controlling our responses.

I preached on something similar to this in East Mains a while back when I was looking at the theme of holiness. Much of this came out of reflections for one of my courses, theological reflection. Here is an excerpt from a couple of the journal entries:

“…Have been thinking for the past dew weeks about how we practically apply the ‘be holy as I am holy’ verses. Want to balance what transformation God does in us, and what God calls us to be, with how we practically engage in that ourselves, so that we are not just being spoon feed all the time but really growing. Feel God’s led me to share some verses from Romans and Philippians to do this. Here are my thoughts that will begin to be shaped into the sermon.

Romans 12:1-2

The passage begins ‘therefore’, again meaning in light of all that has been said before. In light of how sinful we are, in light of how Jesus has saved us, in light of how nothing can now separate us from the love of God, here is how we are to live as Christians. We are to offer ourselves as living and holy sacrifices, set apart for God. Not living the way we used to, but living radically new and different lives. As Christians we live under a new rule, that of Christ, and therefore we live a new kind of life. We become holy as we set ourselves apart to live under the rule of Christ, becoming living sacrifices offering God ourselves completely and wholly. Often we talk about these verses in terms of being in the world but not of the world. J.B Philips puts it like this: ‘don’t let the world squeeze you into its own mould.’ In other words allow God to transform you from the inside out.

The key to the transformation is on the inside. Now God has changed our hearts, we need to allow Him to transform our minds. Though people may help us, the process of God renewing our minds is down to God and us. Only we can decide to let God renew our minds; it’s an internal thing as well as a personal thing. Renewing our mind means allowing God to alter the way we think, our mindsets. This in turn will change the way we act, as it springs from how we think not the other way around. Often our actions are unchanged because our mind is unchanged. Renewing our minds allows us to live as holy people, not just say we are holy people, regardless of how we feel or the circumstances we find ourselves in.

However, renewing our mind is a process. Yet the more we actively engage in it, the more we will be transformed. We do this by taking every thought captive and making it obedient to Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). Anything that might come against us and stop us being the holy people God says we are to become, we need to bind in Jesus’ name. Our thoughts and actions therefore have Jesus as their benchmark, and it is Jesus power that changes us. There is no room for laziness in our thinking. No room for the enemy to get in and form a stronghold. No room for pacing ourselves. We take every though opposed to Christ captive, sending it to the cross where Jesus will deal with it.

Philippians 4:8

Meditating on the Word of God is key to renewing our minds and being transformed. We reflect on, think about, ponder and grapple with the Word of God until it becomes such a part of us that its like we take it and in and put in on, discovering what God says about Himself and what God says about ourselves. God calls me His child … God says I am bought with a price … God calls me precious … God loves me. Renewing our thoughts leads to freedom and growth.

Truth is key, especially with so much around us lying to us and trying to deceive us. We need to know, to put on, the truth of God. In the armour of God, the Word is described as the sword of truth … its what we use to battle. The enemy doesn’t like it when we’re growing in holiness, and so will try to stop it in any way he can. He may plant thoughts in our minds but he can’t be in our minds. Knowing truth and then speaking it out is using our sword to do battle and stick it to the enemy. Jesus said ‘you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free’ (John 8:32). Free from what and for what? Free from what the world tells us to be, and free to be the people God made us and Jesus redeemed us to be. Truth transforms. Renewing our minds enables us to be holy as God is holy...”

Bobby also shared some thoughts from Psalm 144 and 145 about the daughters (women) being called to uphold society and the House (church) as well as the son’s (men) also being part of the story. She linked this to Isaiah 42:10 and covenant relationships, firstly with God and then secondly with others. There were some good points that need more unpacking, but won’t do that just now, maybe some other time.

2. Fashioned to be ourselves
We are not to be clones and deny our personal uniqueness, yet equally we need to realise that it is Christ that defines us.
God is creative, and we are made in God’s image, therefore we have permission to be our beautiful redeemed selves. After all the most beautiful and profound women are often those who know who they are and are happy to be themselves.
The enemy loves to attack our personhood because its attached to confidence which is in turn attached to our fruitfulness – don’t draw back from who God has made us to be.

Think this is a particularly good point. Am often frustrated, when it comes to girls and women in particular, as we so often settle for second best and less than all God has for us. At times this is because we believe lies, at times it is because of insecurities, at times it is through fear. Yet Jesus said we would know the truth and the truth would set us free. The truth is that we are made in God’s image. The truth is that we are redeemed. The truth is that the Holy Spirit dwells within us enabling and quipping change and growth. The truth is God loves us with a deep, lasting and profound love. Knowing the truth, meditating on truth, is what enables us as women, and as children of God in general, to be who we are made to be – ourselves – and to be comfortable with that. Some of this all is the subject of the book I am beginning to write … its coming along much slower than I imagined!

3. Fashioned to rise up and overcome.
Bobby made an interesting point that life is a series of rise up moments and we need to learn to engage in them. Otherwise we end up coming around the mountain again, merely wasting time getting back to the same point we were at before. God’s call to us is “Come on honey, rise up” – though in my head God says it in a Scottish accent rather than an Australian one, lol.
God’s Spirit infuses, empowers and strengthens us, bringing revelation of God and real truth into our lives. Both of these we need to be open to in order to rise up and overcome.

This is interesting I feel because it does not deny the circumstances, nor belittles them. However, it does shift the focus within them from the circumstances and ourselves, to the One who is above them all and in control of them all.

4. Fashioned to fulfil prophecy.
Isaiah 52:1-2
Psalm 68:11
Not captive anymore, but free in Jesus.

The whole theme and nature of the prophetic is one that interests me greatly. Again it has formed some of my reflections in the past couple of months. Probably most interesting and captivating of all my thoughts has involved something from my favourite theologian, Walter Brueggemann. He writes this in his book The Prophetic Imagination that fulfilling prophecy or acting prophetically involves nurturing, nourishing and evoking a consciousness and perception that is an alternative to the dominant one around us. This idea shaped not only my journal reflection, but the morning prayer I led at college this semester:

"Read: Ezekiel 37:1-14

Walter Brueggemann talks about how we are called to the prophetic ministry of nurturing, nourishing and evoking a consciousness and perception that is an alternative to the dominant one around us in his book The Prophetic Imagination. That is a challenging call, yet as pastors and would-be pastors, if I may use that term, it comes with the job. When we minister to and with people often it is to proclaim an alternative to that which they currently find themselves experiencing, and in that sense it is prophetic.

Ezekiel was told to do the same thing. The Lord took him to speak prophetically to dead bones that they would one day come to life again. Come to life because God, Creator and Sustainer God, would breathe life into them. And so Ezekiel prophesied. And this is what Brueggemann has in mind as he writes about the role of the prophet and the nature of prophetic witness.

He ends with the question, where do we begin? That is a good question. Garry Brotherston has a song called ‘Let Glasgow Flourish’, and as I was pondering that question I listened to it and began to formulate something of part of an answer. The tune is really simple, as are the words, yet they have a potentially profound insight to offer about what it means to offer a prophetic alternative, especially when he talks about belonging to Glasgow.

We are called to proclaim prophetically, to announce the Kingdom of God, to proclaim freedom, salvation, and restoration … to breathe new life into dead bones. Where do we begin? We begin where we are. We begin by seeing the ‘valley’ into which the Lord has taken us. We let God take hold of us, and we listen to what God wants to say to them, and then we preach and praise God’s name in that valley. In doing so we prophetically nurture, nourish and evoke a different reality. It takes many different forms, but the goal and the desired result is the same. We don’t need to ask if change in the places is possible, we just need to let God take hold of us and open our eyes in such a way that we can begin to once again imagine it. After all these dry bones are souls that Jesus died for and for whom Satan will fight. Are you ready to do battle … are you ready to speak prophetically of a new reality? "

If we are to take the idea of warrior, princess, daughters seriously these are points well worth considering. Then we really will be fashioned for greatness!

Song lyrics ...

Was at Frenzy last week thanks to the kindness of a friend. Saw the band Leeland for the first time, and a line they sung really stuck in my mind. It's kept coming back to me throughout today. The line is this:

Let Your wings cover us with the promise for communion.

Great lyrics. But what does it mean for God to cover us with His wings, to promise us communion?

Immediately into my mind springs the images of bread and wine - what we refer to as communion. Symbols that remind us we are covered by the blood of Jesus, that we have the promise of forgiveness and the gift of new life. The bread and wine - symbols of promise.

Yet communion has another meaning. In the dictionary communion is also defined as being about intimate communication, the sharing of thoughts and emotions, fellowship. Psalm 91 talks eloquently of this kind of communion:

"Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
This I will declare about the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I trust him ...
He will cover you with his feathers.
He will shelter you with his wings.
His faithful promises are your armour and protection."
Psalm 91:1-2,4 (NLT)

In the NIV it talks of finding shelter in the Almighty when the Lord becomes your dwelling place. About God being both refuge and fortress, covering us with His feathers and giving us protection under His wings, so that He becomes our shield and rampart. What great images shield and rampart are, and what a picture being covered by God's feathers and protected under His wings paints. This is intimate fellowship. This is deep communication. This is what God desires and what I desire also.

So Lord, let your wings cover us with the promise of communion.
Let Your wings cover me with Your promise of communion.

Who can be trusted?

Found my pictures from Warm Springs last year ... this was taken in the grounds of one of the Mercer University campuses - this is the Atlanta one. It's home to McAfee School of Theology - local Baptist seminary ...

They have a cast iron figure of the founder of the school sitting on a bench surrounded by some great saying. This one however, I thought was just particularly funny ...


Would love to go back there and maybe take some classes some time ... would be a whole different experience to SBC ... who knows maybe some time I will ...

Sermon's ...

Reading The Preacher King: Martin Luther King Jr. and the word that moved America at the moment. In it Richard Lischer chronicles Martin Luther King Jr.'s life, often using material others choose not to.

Not that far into it yet, but already discovering something of his influences in preaching. The man really knew how to preach - it was clearly a God-given gift. He was surrounded by good preachers, both sustainers and reformers within the African-American church, though he rarely spoke of them. What I know of his speech's (which really were always sermons) I am moved by, though in truth I actually know very little about the man behind these. I'm looking forward to getting more of an insight into this great nation changing man of God.

One thing is evident from the outset though - Martin Luthe King Jr. was a preacher and he was going to preach the Word of God no matter what. His use of language and abilty to convey truth with creativity is something I most definately aspire too. In the prologue Lischer says 'A sermon is a cultic performance of a biblical text among people who identify themselves as Christians.' I like that definition, though I'm sure already that King would say it was a cultic performance of a biblical text amongst people, whether they were Christian or not. While many view the word performance negatively when it comes to preaching and sermons, I don't. While you don't become a different person, you do in a sense do something different. A sermon is, at best, a point where something of heaven touches earth. It is a performance in that we bring the best of us at any given moment and then God uses us to convey His truth, His words, by His Spirit. And like at the end of any performance an actor will give, we have taken on and taken in the role and the message so much that we are spent at the end - exhausted yet exhilerated. What happens next, like with any performance, is up to the listener - those with ears to hear do, and those who don't remain deaf, unresponsive to the invitation to converse with the Almighty.

Yes, a sermon is a cultic performance of a biblical text amongst people, and what a performance it can be! I wonder what kind of cultic performance God and Mark have in store tomorrow ...

Space to reflect ...

Haven't blogged in a long, long time. To be fair, have been doing a theological reflection class this semester though ... so much of my blog material (only better possibly) has appeared in course journal.

However, that class is coming to an end and been thinking of ways to continue reflecting, which is now easier to do on a keypad with a computer screen in front of me than it is on paper ... perhaps that in itself is a reflection of college life ... and so this blog is coming out of hibernation.

What shape it will take will be interesting to see, I'm not sure really. Before I have often started something and not finished it (see Soul Survivor posts for example) ... one thing for sure is that there will definately be less of that! To be honest though, it is likely only to ever be me that reads it. But that is ok, for I do not necessarily write for an audience, but write to create space for reflection to take place in order that I may grow and develop. The process of writing is enough.

Now however it is late, and sleep is needed ...